What Makes You a Great Mom?

I think it goes without saying that the internet is overwhelming. This is true for almost every subject, but for the sake of this post, I'm going to focus on how the internet is overwhelming for moms.
You don't have to spend much time online to see it all...there is an article for each possible parenting style under the sun, and an article against each possible parenting style under the sun. In the span of 15 minutes we can be brought to tears by a heartwarming post about the magic of parenthood, riddled with guilt over the food we do or don't feed our families, and rage over an overzealous "judgy" opinion based article. It doesn't take long before we are questioning everything.
"Am I a bad mom if I let her fuss in her bed for a few minutes?"
"Am I a bad mom if I don't pull over the car the minute they cry?"
"Am I bad mom if I don't play with my baby all day?"
"Am I a bad mom if I .....?"
You can fill in that blank with a thousand different options. I've seen more of that question than I can count.
I've thought that question more than I can count.
I'm not blaming the internet for me feeling that way. No, I think moms have probably felt that way since the beginning of time. It's one of the "hazards" of learning on the job. We have mom instincts, but we aren't always sure we can trust them. Why don't kids come with a manual again?!
The power of the internet in all of this is that it draws those feelings out and brings them to the surface. On one hand it's great. There is a comforting relief in knowing other moms are dealing with the same toddler issues as you. There's relief in knowing other moms have had the same emotions flood through them.
On the other hand, we know a LOT about other parents. We learn about parenting styles and techniques that we had never heard of. We see increasingly imaginative ways of dealing with everything....from potty training, to chores, to discipline.
Let me solidify my point by saying this: I know I'm not alone when I say that I feel overwhelmed by all of this. At first I'm just interested and entertained, but as time goes on, if I'm not careful, I find myself feeling worn down and a little bit like a failure, because I can't keep up on learning about all of these things I should be doing, let alone doing them!
If I stop for a second though (OK, it might take more than a second), and strip all of that away; all of the opinionated articles, all of the feelings that I have associated with reading them and how it relates to me as a mom. If I take all of that away, what am I left with? I'm left with me. I'm left with my husband, and I'm left with my girls. It's just us, and the love we have for each other. The feelings I'm left with when I take away all of the outside voices vying for my attention are a heart squeezing love for them, a fierce protectiveness, and if I'm being completely honest, a heaviness. The heaviness is a mixture of those "since the beginning of time" feelings I was talking about earlier. Fear and worry about raising our girls in today's society. An anxiousness about them gaining independence and venturing out into the world. It's the kind of heaviness that is only relieved when I lay it at the feet of God and pour my mom heart out to him. I have to continually do that though, because the heaviness creeps in often.
My point in all of this is that no matter how often I think "does blank make me a bad mom?" Deep down I know the answer.

The answer is that I am a good mom, and what makes me a good mom is that I love my daughters.

That's it! All the rest of the little things fall by the wayside. The rest is a mixture of happy moments and sad moments, proud moments and moments of regret. The moments of regret usually translate into teachable moments...again, part of learning on the job.
Being a mom is a challenge, and it's a challenge that I've seen so many women handle beautifully, even though every one of us handles it a bit differently.
It's easy to feel like we should maybe be hard on ourselves as moms, so I'm issuing a challenge this Mother's Day. Think about what makes you a good mom. Try and think big picture. Try and see yourself through your children's eyes. What are the most important things to them? What will they remember most about you when they are grown up?
Who are you being right now that makes you a great mom?